Ats Valentine Cards

[menomegirl]

A mass effort from the Angel MB.

Ats Valentine Cards: Various Authors PG13

By: Menomegirl

and Various Authors on the Angel MB

Disclaimer: All characters belong to
Joss, ME, Fox, etc.

Summary: Valentine's Day approaches. Our
gang are all in need of some love. What
valentines will they send? What gifts?
Who do they secretly want to smooch? Yes,
we just want y'all to laugh!



Written by: Menomegirl



>From Lilah To Wesley:

I really like you, but now the point's moot
That damn Wolfram & Hart gave me the boot
What you tried to do for me was really sweet
But I'm laughing in Hell, cause you're sucking
the corporate teat.



>From Cordy To Angel:

I'm so glad to awake from my coma
But your hair makes you look like a flaming
homo
I don't know what I saw in you
I think I'd rather do the Dew.




>From Lindsey To Eve:

Sloppy seconds just aren't my style
But since we have a plan, thought I'd wait
awhile
To tell you what a skank I think you are
You slept with the man I've been waiting for



>From Angel To Lindsey:

Didn't you learn anything when I cut off your
hand?
It won't take me long to foil your silly plan.
Your wish to seduce me will go astray
Since the network doesn't think we're gay



>From Wesley To Angel:

I heard a rumor floating all over town
That you and Lindsey were fooling around
Be still my heart, say it's not true!
I thought I meant everything to you?



>From Harmony To Fred:

Oh my god, girl, what's wrong with your head?
I thought I was the one who was dead
Why don't you pick one of those men?
You're driving us all off the deep end



>From Buffy To Angel:

We're staying in Rome, Dawn's in school
I know you don't think I'm a fool
Andrew told me what you're doing with Spike
I'm writing to tell you both to go take a hike



Written by: Watchandthink:



>From Angel to Nina:

Oh, lovely Nina, howl at the moon,
The time is nigh, come to me soon.
You above, me beneath,
You with hair, me with teeth.
Our romance will bloom with the moon
ascendent,
However, this love is not transcendent.


>From Eve to Lindsey:

Your body is buff and covered with runes,
We'll drive the vamps as crazy as loons.
What you see in me, I'll never know,
Neither do most of the fans of the show

Angel:

When Angel first heard Lindsey croon,
He fell into a love-sick swoon.
He tried to hide his pounding lust,
Behind a mask of fake disgust.
He asked his friends, Are you all drunk?
While planning to seduce the hunk.





>From Wes to Fred:

I love your dark, cascading locks,
But why are you so stuck on Knox?
I know that bad guys are now in vogue..
But why not try a demon hunting rogue?


Lorne, about himself:

I sing like a dream and I'll read your aura,
When I have to go out I wear a fedora.
Some would say my love life's in a rut.
But your heart gets squashed when it's in your
butt.


Andrew to Spike:

Compared to you, I'm a young one.
But I love you, you blooming onion.
Grab your hog, let's go for a ride.
You'll be the groom, I'll be your bride.



>From Angel to Jasmine:

I saw you and I wore yellow,
I stopped being a broody fellow.
My joy was so pure
I wasn't sure
If I would lose my goodness and soul
Then I realized your face was a maggot hole

Angel:

We know Angel loves his blonds,
Just like a fern loves it fronds.
And Spike thinks Angel's a hunky fellow,
And so he dyes his hair bright yellow.
And all their fighting and dissension
Is just a sign of sexual tension.

Lorne:

Here's a secret I doubt you knew:
Lorne has a great big crush on Groo.
When he sees Groo's manly champion strut,
His heart starts pounding in his butt.
So the offer to Groo from our demon green?
Hey, forget Cordelia... I'll be your queen.

Wesley:

Our rogue demon hunter extraordinaire,
Used to have manly facial hair.
Now he's clean shaven, clipped and cut,
There's a spring in his step, a jump in his
strut....
He's gotten into the clean-cut groove,
Cause Angel likes his Wesley smooth.

Willow:

Willow thought Fred was kind of a dish.
With her big ole' eyes like Lillian Gish.
They swapped some stories, in Latin, no less,
That she was being hit on, Fred didn't guess.
But she babbled so much that when she was
done,
Willow, turned off, said, I'm seeing someone.

Menomegirl:

How can you hate my Angel dear?
His need for love is oh so clear.
He and Linds have a private dance,
It's called a love & hate romance.
They dare not call their love by name,
They'd rather suffer death than shame.

Spike:

Spike was attacked and his arms were removed.
Angel watched over him, until he improved.
Spike so enjoyed his sire's bedside manner,
That he decided to fly his star Spangeled
banner.





Written by: LilOrchidJenny



Fred to Wes:

I used to see you as a friend,
Buddy, pal and what-not.
But now I know I can't pretend,
Truth is I think you're hot.


Fred to Spike:
Dearest Spike, I wish you the best,
But I'm not really into SPRED.
For Wesley's the one that caught my heart,
I'd rather be dearly WED.



Written by: wytewytch72



Senior Partners to Fang Gang

Once you all were brave and true
helping the helpless was the thing to do.
Now we have you in our power
surely this is evil's finest hour!



Written by: LovingAHeart



>From Angelus:

Your neck could be red
Your body black and blue
Let's share my "love" in a way
That the doctor will always remember you



>From Angelus to Buffy:

Little Miss Buff
Sat on her tuff
Baking cookies all day
Along came Spike
Who bedded the tike
And together they drove sweet Angel away.



Angel to Spike:

What I love about you:
Your gawd awful poems.
Your plastered radioactive hair.
The fact that you never find the need to
change clothes.
That tilt of your head.
That smirky smile.

Oh hell - take me I'm yours!



Spike to Andrew:

Your embrace was as tight as a drum
But was that your hand on my bum? Your Gandolf
reference was cool
But you made me look like a fool.
If you want to be my paramour,
Don't hug me in front of the guys any more!

Spike:

Spike loved his kittens - all colors and
types.
He had quite a collection from his card games
at night.
But he lost interest in that type of kitty
When he found a Slayer that was young and
pretty.

Come to my crypt and play he would say.
Oh no said she - not on any given day.
He pestered and stalked and then there was
that kiss.
And down came the house - roof, boards, and
bricks

On Slash:

"The L/A Ship" cries one.
Another shouts "Spangel".
As for me
I'll take all three.
Wet, in leather, and in a tangle.



Written by: DemonAlex2K4



Spike to Drusilla

You may be quite a bit crazy
Your thoughts may be a bit hazy
But from all that I hold true
Remember what I say Dru
You bite my neck
and I'll bite yours too



Connor to Cordy

You were a bit strange in the bed
now you're comatose and nearly dead
but what was most shocking
what seemed like a weird omen
I find it real strange...
that you gave birth to a full grown black
woman!



>From Spike to Harmony
I know that you'll always care
from the way you call me blondie bear
you tried to stake me
and you know thats true
but in the end
you try to dust me
and I'll dust you too




Written by: Karocel98



>From Spike to Drusilla:

you left me luv, 'tis true
for an demon with antlers most thorny
but I'll continue to woo
my beloved Dru
and strive to become more horny





Written by: Amel950



>From Xander to Spike:

When you burnt my heart was in the gutter,
Now you're alive and it is all a flutter.
The Spandex love was pure and sweet
Cause you thought I was a "nummy treat".

Though just a friend you claimed to be
There was more to you and me.
No one knew it, perhaps it's true
But there was love twixt me and you.



>From Harmony to Fred:

You got no curves
You got no style
Eat some damn food
And you'll drive men wild.



>From Gunn to Fred:

Yo girl! I know you're over me,
But I have eyes and I can see Your messing
with my boy, AD.
Oops, in the show he's called Welsey.

I know you ain't no skanky ho,
So why you trippin with my bro?
Is it WED, or SPRED, or FOX? You know
Which ship do you want to go with the flow?

So make a choice and make it quick.
Your attitude it makes me sick.
And while we're talkin sick, you stick
Have a few more tacos, that's the trick!



Lorne to, well, just about anybody:

Roses are red,
Grass is green.
Am I not the sexiest Pylean
You ever have seen?


>From Lindsay to Angel:

Baby I'm back! I've been waiting for you.
And what do you know? I'm doing Eve too!
My intentions for you are not pure and true.
Just get me alone, you'll see what I can do



Written by: SpikFan



Angel to Spike:

>From the moment I saw you,
My heart's been aflame.
But your desire was Dru,
So my love I did tame.

Together we hunted, Love,
Together we killed
Until the Powers above,
My soul did instill.

You hated and shunned me Spike,
I never forgot,
Told me to take a long hike,
And find my own lot.

I left and wandered alone,
Craving your cold touch. Longing for those abs
of stone,
In the night so much.

A long many years did pass,
Until next we met.
Yet you felt I was still crass,
My lust you failed to whet.

Now we stand on equal ground,
Our souls both restored.
My love to you I shall sound,
>From mountain to shore.

I love you Spike can't you see?
Please, tell me you do.
All along I've waited for thee,
Return my 'I love you.'

I can't bear separation,
>From your icy touch.
This is no infatuation,
Only Buff was such.

I will shower you with gifts,
Hold a big bold sign.
I'll admit to wearing lifts
If you're my Valentine.

I love you Spikey baby!



>From Spike to Angel:

You came from the shadows,
Reeking of lust.
I knew all at once
I would crave you and trust.

You brought me such pleasure.
You gave me such pain.
We tumbled together,
The ground we did stain.

Then you drifted away,
Your heart full of hate.
For the way that you imposed,
On my weak innocent state.

I wanted to hold you,
Tell you to stay.
But my eyes you avoided,
Kept your feelings at bay.
There were nights that I dreamt,
Of your icy cold touch.
Wrapping around me,
And holding me such.

My eyes, they did shed,
Many buckets of tears.
Knowing you left me,
Realizing my fears.

I hoped you still loved me,
I hoped you still cared.
When I saw you again,
My passion was bared.

You tortured and teased me,
Just like before.
In your arms you held Dru,
But it was me you adored.

The hurt it was great,
When I lost you again.
You buried yourself,
In those feelings of sin.

Now all that is past,
There's no one to blame.
You are my lover,
My soul's single flame.

You tell me you love me,
That you've never regret.
Those times full of passion,
Once the red sun did set.

I love you my Angel,
You are my desire.
My urges can't wait,
Come TAKE ME Grandsire!



Written by: smartnprettyboy



>From Spike to Angel

How I love you in many different ways
Let me count the different ways
I love the way your stupid poufy hair sticks
straight up
I love the way you glare at me
I love the way your leather coat seems to have
a life of its own
I love the way your :) look in those leather
pants I love the way you wear various socks
without any real sense of fashion style
I love the way your eyes travel my body when
you think I'm not looking
You stupid poof, I love you so much!



Ode to Money, by Anya

I love the way the dollar bills look
Rectangular, green, and crisp
Beautifully inked portraits of long since dead
men
I love the way the dollar bills smells
Having been next to more dollar bills
How the smell of fresh and old ink lingers
I love the way the dollar bills feel to the
touch
Soft and wrinkled after being handled by
various customers
Smooth and crisp, uncorrupted by the others'
touch
I love the way money can be exchanged for
goods
Goods in turn if appropriately priced can be
exchanged for further more money
Until my bank account is filled to its maximum
limit
And I have to open another account so more
money can be stored for my future needs for
various goods and/or profits
Money, money, money, how I love you!!!